Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Remembering 9/11

I was only a child when I learned about 9/11.

It was late at night in Malaysia when the news went viral. The planes had just crashed into the World Trade Center not long ago. My dad had pulled up the images online and my family gathered in front of the computer screen, watching the frozen tragedy in silence.

Back then, I knew nothing about terrorist attacks. I couldn't comprehend the situation at hand. All I knew was some really bad men had hijacked the planes and drove them into the towers on purpose. I had so many questions pertaining to the attacks. Why America? Why kill so many innocent people? And how on earth could anyone be brainwashed to kill themselves?

It was something my 11-year-old mind failed to understand. 

When I came to America, I learned so much more about 9/11 and how it really affected the people. 9/11  left a huge scar in the history of America, a scar that can never be erased. Even with the eradication of the old towers and the erection of the new ones, the memory of 9/11 and its bitter aftermath will always haunt the minds of many.

I wrote an editorial last year on the 9/11 photographers. They deserved some recognition for their efficiency in risking their lives for the public. In that editorial, I referred to them as "heroes." While they weren't firemen or policemen who ran into the rubble to save dying victims, they risked their lives by saving the memories of the tragedy on their cameras. In order to do that, many of them actually had to go near the rubble, with no guarantee that a building wouldn't collapse as they took photos. They photographed New York's greatest catastrophe and thanks to them, we have vivid shots of the tragedy. 

In class today, one of the girls said she witnessed a documentary on 9/11 that astonished her. Apparently, when the first plane collided into Tower 1, several workers in Tower 1 hurried outside to see what had happened. And the security in that area actually told them, "Go back to your offices." So they did.

At that moment, those in Tower 2 had also done the same thing, but were told that a plane had accidentally crashed into the first tower and that Tower 2 was going to be fine, so they were sent back to their conference rooms. And right after that, the second plane struck.

When I was in New York over the summer, I went to the 9/11 Memorial by myself. While waiting in line, I met a friendly French girl named Diana who spoke good English and we talked about the impact of 9/11. The memorial site contained a museum (it was under construction when we went), and two deep, large square pools called the Reflection Pools. They were bordered by a railing with names etched into the metal surface.

These were the names of the people who had died in the tragedy. There were nearly 3000 names in total. 


Later, I learned that the pools were where the two towers used to be. Standing there with the other visitors, I closed my eyes and tried to envision the chaos that took place 11 years ago. I knew what I imagined could never come close to the raw reality of the moment. 


This was where Tower 1 used to be. Behind the fence, the construction of the new World Trade Center was taking place.


I lived with a nice family in New York. I remember asking the mother if she'd like to go to the 9/11 Memorial with me, and she instantly shook her head and said, "No. I'll never go, and I won't even go near that area. I just can't."

After some probing, she finally revealed why she was so adamant on avoiding Ground Zero. These were her words, translated by me:

"On the morning of 9/11, my sister took the subway to Manhattan, near Ground Zero. The moment she got out of the subway station, the first plane had just attacked Tower 1. There was chaos everywhere. A lot of people assumed it was an accident. Before anyone could figure out what was going on, the second plane hit Tower 2. And that was when people finally realized that this was no accident. But it was too late, people were jumping off from Tower 1 because they were only faced with two choices - either they died in the fire, or they died from crashing into the ground thousands of feet below. The latter seemed a lot quicker, so many of them started jumping. Body parts were everywhere. Limbs were hanging off lamp posts. Blood was on the streets. People were running for safety, but most of them were just running away from the horror. No one could stand to watch the tragedy any longer. Tower 2 collapsed and more people died. 

By then, the area was covered with so much dirt and rubble, that my sister found it hard to see. The air was thick with smoke and debris. People were running in every direction; no one really knew where to go because the place was suddenly so unrecognizable. The subway stations were closed. Phone lines were disrupted. At that moment, I had just found out about the incident and I tried calling my sister to ask if she was okay. I wanted to know that she was safe, but I had no way of reaching her. She couldn't call either. In the chaos of everything, she had to literally feel her way back to the house, back to our front door. 

Debris coated the roads and nearby buildings like a blanket that obscured her sense of direction. Even though she'd been to that area many times, she couldn't recognize where she was. Not in the chaos. Not while everything was covered in brown and black. It was that bad. She had to feel her way through the mess and back to our suburb. It was a long walk back from Ground Zero. It took her about 2 hours to get home by foot. Those 2 hours were the worst hours of my life. Do you know what it was like, sitting in the living room, crying, praying for her safety? Hoping hard that she'd come home. Do you know the fear of possibly losing someone you love? I had no way of contacting her so I could only hope she was okay. I was so afraid I'd lost her. And when she finally came home, my heart... my heart was so relieved, I hugged her and we both cried."

And that was why she could never bring herself to visit Ground Zero or the area surrounding it. Even as she was recounting the awful day to me, tears were slowly streaming down her face like stifled rivers of trepidation.



"9/11 was a reminder that the bonds of family can be severed in an instant. They are essential, crucial, valuable, fragile." -Peter Jennings, late news anchor of ABC's World News Tonight

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